My Billion Year Contract
of a Former Scientologist
Crash of the Nancy 9000
In the movie 2001: a Space Odyssey, the computer that controlled the ship begins to act erratically with dreadful consequences. In the sequel we learn that it, the computer, was given conflicting orders. Besides the orders that were given to the crew there was another set of orders, secret ones, which set the stage for murder by machine. The conflict of differing agendas within the “mind” of the computer was impossible to reconcile; the computer could follow conflicting orders any more than a human can serve two masters.
The beginning of the book tells of Nancy’s flight from reality and her frantic paranoid delusions. She was a Scientologist. It
is the understanding of this simple statement that this book is about. The following was posted by Nancy under the name Kathryn in an internet news group during 1998.
Sunday night, February 11, l996
I went to sleep. Around 2 AM I was awakened with the cracking of my mind, myself, my soul. I don’t know how else to describe it, other than my mind broke. I was driven to do something, but I did not know what. I was yelling at my husband, but it didn’t feel as if I was yelling the words.
I left the house running. My husband, who was chasing me, caught me before I left the driveway. I paced around the car and tried to touch the trees. My husband calmed me enough to get me back into the house. I was scared to death. Something had happened to my mind and I knew I was now in a different place. My husband called OSA Int. and spoke with my auditor (who happened to be up at 2AM). She spoke with my husband and then myself. All I remember of our conversation was her saying “There is no tech to handle this”. I remember feeling as though I was off in the distance, while thinking, “She could at least have lied to me.”
This is reminiscent of the mental collapse of Lisa McPherson. But the auditor was right in her own way. In Scientology there is no “tech” that could help her. For as much as this group may revile mental health providers they offer nothing of any clinical value to anyone suffering from a mental meltdown. The things that they do offer, mega doses of certain vitamins and herbs, would make the problem worse. No matter what Scientology may claim. L. Ron Hubbard was not a medical doctor, or a nuclear scientist or a learned man in any respect whatsoever. He wrote stuff by the seat of his pants. Later his son “Nibs” would reveal that he and his dad spent a weekend reading what literature was available on vitamins at that time. This became the infamous “Purification Rundown.” That was the extent of Hubbard’s research.
One thing that is obvious from the beginning is that Nancy never lost her inner voice that could recognize right from wrong. This is, I believe, the very crux of the matter. Sure, she believed in Scientology and did some underhanded things for
them, like being a spy for Scientology while working at Consumer’s Council in Massachusetts. She worked for the Guardian’s Office who “handled” anyone who had a beef with Scientology including reporters, lawyers and writers, complainers, discontented former members and people who wanted to sue in the courts. This era of time as dedicated Scientology watchers know well is rich in history. This was the era of “Snow White,” the infamous caper of espionage that came to grief in a spectacular explosion with Hubbard’s wife, Mary Sue, and a number of other high ranking Scientologists going to federal prison. This was the time of “Operation Freak-out,” that attempted to frame writer Paulette Cooper with a bogus bomb threat, and failing that, to drive her mad.
In 1976 she was sent to Clearwater, Florida, known to Scientologists as Flag Land Base, or simply “FLB.” She was lucky, very lucky to miss being included in the wave of paranoid hysteria that Hubbard had let loose on his followers during that period. Sea Org members were selected to be put into the Scientology penal system, the Rehabilitation Project Force (RPF) on the basis of types of E-meter readings. The random twitching’s of this primitive device were enough to turn people into miserable slaves. Living in the Sea Org was by itself no picnic. Stories told from people who were there during this time tell horror stories about crowded quarters were they were packed into like sardines, the filth, the smell and the insects. Lots of stories from that time complained of cockroaches and spiders. They proved surprisingly resistant to auditing or the intentions of the OT’s. Not to mention the insane working hours, miniscule pay and being yelled at constantly. But the RPF was a lot worse. People were kept in this condition for months on end. Later Hubbard would shift the blame to one of his staff and said it was all due to incompetence and “dirty needles” on the meter.
In 1978 she was promoted into management. Too bad for her that in Scientology rising to the top is sort of like a soldier raising his head above the fox hole. Of course she was sent to the RPF, in her case it was even more miserable because she was pregnant. Space forbids me in this brief review to detail all the indignities and hardships she endured. But one quote is telling, at the end of the day they would have a group meeting to discuss how glad they were to be in the RPF. North Korea had nothing on these people.
“At the end, we would have the obligatory clapping and cheering to a large picture of L. Ron Hubbard. That always got to me; we were thanking LRH for the privilege of being sent to live in a garage and being treated by the rest of our friends and colleagues as a lower status of being.” –page 100.
“I remember one woman in her forties telling me that children are Thetans (spiritual beings)and that they are responsible for their own conditions. I had nothing to worry about and my son would make it. She had a daughter who had apparently gotten into some unsecured cleaning supplies and drank from an open bottle; I could not believe this mother blamed her young cild.” –page 137.
She eventually got released from the RPF, and went to LA with her husband Chris who was also in the RPF, -the tale gets more involved the deeper down the rabbit hole you go. She got back into Scientology management, her husband ran the Celebrity Center. However, there is little stability in Scientology. In 1982 Scientology ran itself off a cliff in a madhouse of power-grabbing and sadism.
Hubbard, who never could not stand the idea that others could make money or even earn a living on Scientology decided to sack and plunder the Scientology mission system, what we would call “franchises.” He sent his proxies, one of them a young man who already had a reputation for ruthlessness, David Miscavige, to Clearwater where they cruelly extorted every cent they could from the mission holders. [Freezone members still don’t understand that Hubbard himself was responsible for the looting of the mission system.] People quit or were thrown out of Scientology in droves; Sea Org members, including some high executives, we being tossed into the RPF prison system in record numbers. It was only a matter of time before Nancy and her husband suffered the same fate. They had enemies in the “Finance Police,” (how’s that for a title?).
But there would be no return to the RPF for this couple, they simply refused to go. This left them only one option, they had to leave the Sea Org. This was not easy but they did it. They became “public” Scientologists. Like many Sea Org members that had almost nothing when they left; little money, no current work history, no drivers’ licenses; in other words the shirts on their backs and little else. They were able to get help from family and friends, with a lot of sheer determination they were able to get their lives back on track. Eventually, with help from family and friends, and heroic efforts of their own, they got back onto their feet. They even made it back to California as members in good standing of Scientology. Her husband Chris found his living in music composition; Nancy worked for a company that used Hubbard’s secular programs for business growth. For a time they worked hard and prospered.
Nancy was also persuaded to take up her old line of work as a spy, although it was as a volunteer. David Mayo, one time friend and co-worker in Hubbard’s growing empire, had split with Scientology and worse yet, he opened up shop on his own and became a competitor. This was as bad as it gets for a Scientologist. As a spy she went to Mayo’s meetings and penetrated his circle of friends; all the while reporting back to her Scientology bosses. After reading her account of this episode I can’t help thinking that the seeds of doubt, which were probably there already, were added to.
In 1990 a fundamental shift took place in the way WISE (World Institute for Scientology Enterprises) operated. Her company, as a member of this group, was now put into the position of actively recruiting people to become Scientologists. The ruining of the mission system played itself out; few people were now joining. Pressure was put on Scientology companies to
take up the slack. Nancy considered this nothing more than “bait and switch” tactics. Soon she was looking for something more honest. To this end she became a Field Staff Member, delivering Scientology services on her own, paying a percentage of course to Scientology. She also opened up her own personal and business consulting service.
At a point earlier in her Scientology career Nancy had worked for the Guardian’s Office as a spy. Scientology always had work for spies, in fact they still do, spy work has never been out of vogue for this cult. After the convulsion that just about blew Scientology out of existence there were people who decided to go out on their own and start Scientology splinter groups.
Nancy was recruited to spy on some of these people. This was done by the Office of Special Affairs or “OSA,” the group that had replaced the Guardian’s Office after Mary Sue Hubbard and others went to jail for spying on government agencies.
Nancy thought that while technically this independent Scientology was illegal due to copyright considerations she nonetheless liked some of the people involved. And now that she was free of the Sea Org she had access to computers and television where she heard new opinions concerning life, spirituality and how that related to Scientology. In Scientology such freedom is frowned upon for they know that information and freedom are two words that are alien to Hubbard’s tech. Scientology operates on secrecy and control; their infamous motto: “Think for yourself,” is only a contemptible lie. formation leads to action which in this case was contacting a person out of favor with Scientology. Six months later her e-mail was tossed in her face by an OSA fanatic. The fat was in the fire. Once something like this happens you will never again be trusted by Scientology. Andy auditing that you do will be heavy into sec checks and could contain a type of reverse auditing known as “Black Dianetics.”
My favorite quote in the book concerns the abysmal condition of child education in the cult.
“I called Delphi, the largest most well-known Scientology school that taught a high school curriculum. I asked the admissions person there for some statistics on their graduates: what their SAT scores were, what sort of colleges they got into, and what percentage received college scholarships. My first clue that this wasn’t what I was looking for came when she told me she didn’t know what I meant by SAT scores but that a large majority of their high school graduates joined the Sea Org and they were very proud of that.”
This book is well worth the time to read and I would rate it generally in the same category as the other books I have so far reviewed specifically “Counterfeit Dreams,” by Jeff Hawkins and “Abuse At The Top,” by Amy Scobee. The one question that I cannot completely answer is why do otherwise intelligent people stay so long in a deranged cult like Scientology? We are talking about some first class dementia here, not just a little internet conspiracy theory. This is a question I cannot fully
answer. The most I can say is that is makes me think of riding on a speeding bus with no cord to ring for a stop. You may want to leave but if you head for the door the driver and the other passengers would bark a warning to you. So you keep riding and riding until you realize that you are not on a bus at all. Instead, you are on a little donkey the type Sancho Panza rode when he followed his master on his crazy quests. At this point you can get off and send the ass back to the other asses.